I was invited to be in an art show called Alter Ego. For several months, I’ve had the idea to do some art/fashion portraits of the regular characters I inhabit in the theater of my head. I wanted to show the inner alter egos we all have, how we see ourselves in fantasies, daydreams, and also the male/female anatomy that makes up our psyche that may go unacknowledged. I don’t really express either persona on the outside at all, but maybe things do come out slightly and don’t get fully explained in my words or actions. This show gave me an opportunity to execute these ideas. There was one character I missed but I hadn’t quite thought her out yet, and I didn’t have the right outfit on hand anyways. Everything is completely self-styled, self-shot, and the shirts in both photos are my creations. These photos are amateurish, I know, but I think this gives them an intimate, honest and immediate feel.

Alter Ego I (if I were a guy)
May 2008
18″ x 24″ print

Most of the time I’m not a girly-girl. I call people “man” a lot. I feel more comfortable having male friends than female friends. And I wonder from time to time what it’d be like to be a guy. How would I look? How would I carry myself? Walk? Stand? How would I dress? Would I be considered good-looking or dorky or ugly? I was trying to think of all the guys I know and how they stand and position their arms, necks, shoulders… body language. It was actually physically uncomfortable to stand like a man. I had to mentally push my hips and butt out of the way, and the awkwardness showed in the shots where I was standing. Although I think my choice of pants had something to do with that – they needed to be looser and more concealing of curves. Here I look like a cross between my dad and my uncle (on my mom’s side). It’s weird. Closeup of the shirt is here.

Alter Ego II (the diva)
May 2008
18″ x 24″ print

This is the Diva. Dramatic, eccentric, elegant, bold, aloof one second, loud the next, ultra feminine. I like how the makeup came out. Operatic (female) but also drag queen (male). Detail of self-made shirt here.

Basic Self/Test Shot

Outtakes

I’ve been thinking about a shoot like this since last fall, and especially had the idea to wear a small hat or beehive hairdo thrust towards the forehead, but had neither the hat nor hair to do so. Also working against too little time & too much humidity in my non-climate-controlled studio.